What is Missed

There are hundreds of words that could describe the feelings and reactions that humans are sharing since the arrival of Covid-19.  The media runneth over. Our conversations with friends and family members allow us to wash and wear our emotions and over and over as we sort out how we are "doing".  We're all just trying to keep our heads above water, really, as slowly we drown.  We come up for air just long enough to realize that the surface we desperately seek is far from the relief that we had wished it would be.  I can clearly recall the words of friends as this all started....."hopefully, this will all be over by the Summer.....if it's not.....??????" The Summer is officially here now.  There's no turning back to make it different. The drum has rolled and we're dancing to a new beat.

 We  await a current set of statistics, those that will reflect the outcome of relaxation, either by defiance or government decree, of the "rules" that have successfully contained the Virus, flattened the so-called curve.  I suspect that we are in for some surprises.  And, I am in the group that believes that we are still in for the long run. I hope I am dead-wrong. 

I take a self-inventory every so often, assessing the impact of all of this on my life. In those hundreds of possible words, only one rises to the top, one makes it through the pounding surf of emotional waves. Spontaneity. That's what I am missing. That's what we all are missing and have been since late March of this year. The simple acts that used to be woven so gently into daily life, making them virtually un-noticed.  Going out for a morning coffee with a few good friends for a chin-wag, stopping by to visit a shop owner, collecting ingredients for a special meal. Doing art together. Browsing in a thrift shop. Hugging, kissing, shaking the hand of a new friend. Using hand sanitizer wipes on the handle of a shopping cart just out of habit, not necessity. Acting on impulse.Selecting dates and making travel plans, casting fate to the wind.  The bliss of anticipation, counting days until departure, packing slowly and dreaming of being transplanted to happy places. Getting a haircut. Buying an ice cream. Sitting on a beach at sunset, grasping onto the last of daylight and feeling sad that a day has ended. Not looking forward to a day's end, to the catapulting of life into a brighter future.